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Christine Stevens
Jan 12 min read
I Ordered the Maggots and Feces at this New Restaurant But I Didn't Expect to Actually Get Maggots and Feces
I’m starting to feel disappointed. I came to this new restaurant, Make America Eat Sh!t Again , so excited to support a place that was...
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Christine Stevens
Nov 23, 20243 min read
Thank You, Chickens, for Hiring Me, the Fox, to Guard Your Hen House
U.S. Rep. Jim Jordan, the Republican from Ohio’s Champaign County, has long been a political lightning rod. But the ex-wrestler who...
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Christine Stevens
Jul 9, 20243 min read
Confessions of a Crash Test Dummy
I have to get something off my chest. Granted, it’s a chest that's been crushed by a steering wheel at least 87 times this week alone,...
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Christine Stevens
Jun 27, 20242 min read
Following Casino Model, Gun Store Offers Free Drinks to Shoppers
HUNTSVILLE, AL: In an effort to boost sales, local firearms retailer Locked and Loaded has begun offering free drinks to customers as...
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Christine Stevens
May 20, 20242 min read
From Crops to Crap: World's Richest Farmland Now Growing Self-Storage Spaces
HADLEY, MA: Western Massachusetts, known to possess some of the most fertile farmland in the entire world, is growing a new crop -Â a...
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Christine Stevens
Feb 13, 20242 min read
The Letter X is Having a Moment
Everyone Wants a Piece of X Ok stop. Really. It’s no big deal. Actually…you’re right, it is a big deal. Musk is obsessed with me....
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Christine Stevens
Oct 22, 20233 min read
1791:The Founding Fathers Discuss the Finer Points of the Second Amendment
Benjamin Franklin: So I’m wondering, with this well regulated militia and right to bear arms idea, that we might want to think about what...
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Christine Stevens
May 28, 20238 min read
More Letters to This Day in History: Women's History v. Plain Old History
The following is the actual correspondence between me and the History Channel regarding their This Day in History selection of historical...
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Christine Stevens
Mar 4, 20233 min read
Church and State Hold Press Conference to Announce End of Separation
WASHINGTON, D.C.: In a bold move completely defying more than 200 years of practice, Church and State have announced the end of their...
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Christine Stevens
Jan 1, 20232 min read
Driver's License No Longer a Requirement in Half of America's States
MONTGOMERY, AL: Drivers in 25 states in the US are claiming a victory for the Car Rights movement. Advocates are cheering the passage of...
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Christine Stevens
Oct 2, 20222 min read
New Food Truck Caters to College, Cannabis Crowd
AMHERST, MA: A new food truck specifically aimed at late night student revelers and the weed community has opened its windows on the...
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Christine Stevens
Jun 4, 20212 min read
Texas Governor Abbott Approves Use of Vending Machines for Firearm Sales
Houston, TX: Governor Greg Abbott of Texas has approved the use of vending machines for the sale of firearms. “With the recent freedom we...
3,814 views0 comments
Christine Stevens
Aug 3, 20202 min read
Quick Update from the Principal re: the Lion in your Classroom
Dear Garfield Middle School Teachers,
I received a lot of feedback from many of you after my previous note about lions in your classrooms
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Christine Stevens
Aug 1, 20203 min read
Note from the Principal: This Fall Your Classroom Will be Equipped with a Lion
Dear Garfield Middle School Teachers,
As we prepare for the start of our school year, I wanted to alert you to a recent addition to your
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